Some Random Thoughts Shared by My Cowboy and Me on What The Spirit of Christmas Means and Brings...

Its Christmas..again..The Most Universally celebrated festival of the year...a Season in which children of all Ages and Lands and all Faiths celebrate something special..A special kind of Joy..Lots of Love and happiness and the beauty of a Giving Heart,,

Each Christmas I think of my beloved parents and how they went out of their way to make our Christmas holidays filled with fun and laughter and joy..How much we took for granted..Though we come from a Hindu family My parents were World traveled and very Eclectic..We studied in Boarding Schools that were founded way back in the British Raj and our Teachers were Catholic Nuns..so Christmas was celebrated when we came home during the Christmas holidays in India....and that is one of the reasons why I have been able to understand Brian's faith and way of life so well....I will also say that many Hindus who have had a privileged and Westernized upbringing are broad minded and tolerant and very open minded and respectful to all Faiths .
 I think of Mrs Secords or `Aunt Betty' of St Catherine's and how she always invited me to spend my Christmas's here when I was new in Canada with Uncle John and her children and their families..
How large and kind that heart of hers which honored the great friendship she  and Uncle John shared with my parents many many years ago.( late 60's)..Little did I Know that she would be taken from all of us last year 2013..and I think of her always with Love and very great respect and gratitude for her  great big kind Motherly Heart..her children who are my friends and their kids are some of the the most wonderful people I have met in my time in Canada..
For me Christmas in Canada has become even more special ever since Brian came into my life in the Spring of 2009..

Before I met him I understood the utter Loneliness which a day like Christmas can bring to a new immigrant in a foreign land who has no one to call his or her  "Their Own"..There is nothing more lonely than watching every one going home to their own families and having no one and no where to go to except alone to your own lonely home :.Lesson> Kids..Don't ever take anyone or anything for granted..when Love comes into your life..cherish and respect and honor it.for.Love and Family and true friends  and your time with them are precious..No One will ever Love you the way your parents did and if you are lucky you will Find a true Love who is worthy of you...Many signs along the old Toronto homes say " Keep Christ in Christmas.." I completely agree".Brian is a Christian and maybe the only one in his family who actually believes in God...and I experience and understand the beautifully spiritual side of Christianity through him..It is not about going to Church or wearing a Badge declaring your faith..but just who you are and how you think..

.My Cowboy Brian and I celebrated this Christmas again with his Mother and his sister Karen's family 
( three teenaged kids Nicole, David and Steven) at their beautiful home in New Castle Ontario for three days..Karen and her husband Greg have a large heart and are lots of fun to be with...
Greg is funny..he likes to break into his Gifts and check them out before everybody else....He is almost like his teenaged sons in that respect...Brian is funnier..He spent a day in building a special " Security  Box" to conceal and secure Greg's gift..so that he couldn't break it..The result? Greg got a hammer and screw driver and sat up on Christmas Eve trying to break into  the box and when he managed to get the latch off.. Brian like a kid took the box up and locked it up in his suitcase until Christmas morning...!

Besides the great " Break the Box" Game We spend Christmas eve sharing jokes and dinner and catching up with  each others lives..
My Brian and his Mother Irene who are both extremely large hearted and generous givers..

X Mas at Vedanta Society TO celebrated by all faiths

Brian's Nephews and Niece call their Grand Ma Irene 
" Granma Santa" and my Cowboy is their Uncle Brian..Once the Gifts are done..like most teenagers these days they disappear.into their " Cyber world."..On TV everything you see is advertisements for Gifts..
 Wondering ?: Is Christmas only about Gifts .or is there even a lesson somewhere..?
Brian says to me..Its the giver who is blessed..More than the receiver and He is always the Giver..who gives more than he ever receives. ..some times I think even appreciation wise.
I  think of poor nations like India and the huge opportunity there always is there to feed and give to the genuine poor and hungry and forsaken..I make a vow and say to Brian..every year from now on..I will keep something aside to send to a school or home in India which serves the poor..The gifts given to them will be more blessed and bring blessings  than any ever given to the privileged..anywhere in the world..I also think of the poor in spirit and heart everywhere..In India I remember the school run by Sri Sarada Math.Pune.. .where little children from the slums were educated and fed and clothed free of cost and they who belonged to no faith or family..celebrated Christmas with as much of joy as any Western child...I was a volunteer teacher at that school during my High School days and still remember my little students who sang ' Jingle Bells, Jingle Bells" and all the nursery Rhymes I taught them in their little high voices...
Observations on Human behavior..Sayings from my Dad..Great People make others feel Great and Small people try to Make others feel small..
Every Family, community, Church, Temple , office and home has its , Mean and Kind ..old lady/ Old man,.Mean or kind young lady/ young man/ Its Teddy bear, Its Rebel..its Sweetheart and  its spoilt mean Brat..its Intellectual.. Its Saint and its Sinner and its `Going going gone' character and its Ding Bat..its Mamma and its Papa and..we all play one of these roles at some time or the other.or a bit of each role....as life goes by...
.When Noble minded people whether in a home or a Train or a Temple/ Church or a  family come together they talk of Noble and Happy things..of positive stuff and of the great and good in every human being.and even a bit of spirituality thrown in....They have immense fun and great times together...without having to be mean and nasty in their thoughts and actions.
When Small minded,Jealous and prejudiced people meet sooner or later the comparison and jokes about people and mean gossip and negativity begins and the knives come out..and Happiness and good will go out of the window.....
A bunch of catty men and women..whether in a Family or at an office or a place of worship or in a house  will `Spite others'. I am blessed that Brian is a very cool, laid back, easy going  spiritual minded and Noble Hearted man who stays far away from venom and gossip. He blesses me and those who know him  in everything he does or says..that made this and every Christmas with him a special experience and blessing for me..
Even in the " family home' whenever he senses negativity either we rise above it by cracking jokes and steering away from mean conversations or just going off on our own together to little nooks and corners where we can keep our " Love Burning and Christmas Spirit High and alive" by staying far away from the " Meowing of a bunch of Cranky Cats"..
Karen and Greg's home has many happy memories and also many lessons for both of us...
I remember telling Greg's daughter that she was lucky to have a Dad like Greg and an Uncle like Brian. Men who are ' One Man Armies' by themselves. They work at jobs..come home and renovate and repair their homes..Greg cooks for his kids..drives everyone around and like Brain can handle  a task alone which would need 10 men from other cultures to complete. ( I have seen how men in many Asian cultures would not enter the kitchen or lift up a finger once they are home) 
There are many men over the world including in Canada who abuse their women, verbally or physically, who target women for attack..who may target a single women if they feel their `manliness' threatened by her independence or just to please their own wives who may dislike someone..Recently  a Police officer who greatly encouraged me to join the Force told me of the untold abuse of women by men in immigrant communities and  even Canadian ones..Women who are blessed to know and be loved by good, honest and truly decent men must realize how lucky we are...Similarly men who have the love of a faithful and truly loving wife are equally blessed. Unfaithfulness and meanness are the worst forms of  abuse within a marriage.

Observation of Teenagers the world over :First Iv'e Been there..Done that"

Most difficult years in life..and also fun and crucial ones too....

Love and Hate are learned emotions which parents and Grandparents and peers can teach their kids..

Recently in  a place of worship I saw  an 18 year old
' Volunteer 'whose parent's pose as `model devotees', show exceptional hate and vengeance on someone his parents do not like. That person who experienced his meaness ..decided to never return for any Public ceremony to the 'Place of Worship' they loved so much ever again..
I remember  my favorite Uncle Runu Kaka telling someone how hate and vengeance are very heavy burdens that one cannot carry without falling down heavily in life....Yet parents and grand parents do not understand how and what they teach their children becomes the " Guiding Stars of Destiny' for their children and grand children..Teaching Demonic hate , racism, division and prejudice shapes their future..
In Canada it is often "politically incorrect" to chasten children and so a Teenager can get away with Abuse..Anger, Meanness and more because parents think " Its alright they are only kids"..This happens everywhere in every community ...Its takes many years for these kids to unlearn behavior and get " De-hypnotized' from Hate and rise to Love and in that process much pain is involved....many people in positions of `leadership' are instigators..they may be " leaders by sheer age,or because some Trust and  responsibility has unfortunately been handed over to them.... and that can lead to many being hurt..( on the sly) this happens especially in places of worship and such people break the Faith of others in the very God they claim to serve...

Brian and I speak  about spiritual things a lot and the words from all great teachers who say that what we see and hear and  take in and perceive shape us. 
I have seen that many kids here in Canada and in India and world over love to watch Horror movies. and play Violent Video games...Many parents think its totally OK..because they Love Horror Movies too..
Where will the Blood shed and violence and Horror go..if not to the heart of a child? That is why I love the slogan " Keep Christ in Christmas"..Keep Peace and Love and tolerance and Kindness always alive.. 
What is one of the saddest sights in the world? A young girl or boy in their teens or younger who is  no longer innocent and child like but Angry, Hate filled, jaded, worldly, mean and calculative. 
What is the sweetest thing in the World?..The innocence of a pure child..! For God they say in all scriptures has the Nature of a Child..

In all it was a beautiful Christmas with Brian and his Mom and Karen's family.. and Brian played old songs on David's Guitar..That is one of the bonds that Brian shares with his nephew David..the Love of the Guitar and playing beautiful music..much of which Brian has written and composed himself..
Christmas is a time we all truly enjoy..

Brian and I watched two movies this weekend..The Indo - Canadian Movie
" Dr Cabbie" which was amazing...I could totally relate and identify myself with the challenges of the Doctor whose struggles echoed my own and which in a sadly humorous way reflects the truth about Canada. Like me the doctor found his true Love here and Like me that Love and not his success became the driving force and reason of his Life ..The ' raison de etre' for his existence..see ( Remembering my" Crime Reporter" days .and .A Walk on the Water Front with my Cowboy  )  
Many well meaning Canadians who have never stepped out of North America still believe that most immigrants got here on a Boat from somewhere.. and take away all the jobs and rights of the people born here..Dont Blame them..the Economic scene here is not pretty at all..
However the Truth is that Skilled Immigrants who come here on a ' Point System" such as I did are expected to have very High Qualifications amongst which includes a University Degree recognized by the Top Most Universities of N America , proficiency in the English or French Language.. Plus they are expected to be young enough  to be of childbearing age  when they land here and have been steadily employed in a recognized and High demand Profession for more than 5 to 8 years...Each Immigrant Must also bring in more than $ 15000 as a security amount to qualify as a skilled Educated Immigrant and have  a clean Police record and good health. Once they arrive they quickly learn that none of these skills except their money and their wits mean anything...and they have to start all over again..though they already made it at a young age in their own  home lands.A study by the Canadian government 12 years ago showed that very few ' Born in Canada" Canadians fitted the Bill expected of their Skilled Immigrants . Yes for those of us who did not quit and run back to our home countries. We started again from zero. Built our lives from scratch and are all proud of who we are, where we came from and where we are going. We fought the battle many times and won!
 More over it is these skilled immigrants who make sacrifices and set high goals for their kids to achieve much..Many of the young people entering Universities in Canada and USA are children of Indo - Canadian/US and Chinese- Canadian /US immigrants and they did not get their seats by hoodwinking the system but by sheer hard work and the help of parents who made huge financial sacrifices and guided and encouraged them. India and China are growing economies because Higher Education has played a huge role in shaping those Nations..However what all of us have learned in North America is the Dignity of Labor.No job is too small or too big and there is dignity and respect in everything you do...There is also a saying."If you can Beat them join them "...
That is why Brian and I both thought that this Movie must go a long way in creating awareness about the realities which new  immigrants face and more understanding about their lives in the minds of most Canadians. we definitely recommend it to everybody...I am Lucky I have  a  man Like Brian who understands and feels the challenges of people and communities beyond the one he was born in...

We also watched the much hyped Movie " Interview " which was vaguely funny but not our type. Too much of Crass and dirty humor..we both realized that " Hey we are no longer Cool..we don't like what most people seem to do"..if cool means Dirty..Mean and very Crass and superficial. then yes Sir..we are just Not cool..we are both really  very" Hot"!

Brian showed me his Christmas spirit in many ways especially when he said.." I don't support cracking jokes and making fun of other cultures and races..though I totally hate their Dictator kings ..having a laugh at their accents and way of life is " Not my Thing".
and That's just one of the reasons  why I love him folks.. That's why I believe that if you have true Love you have everything and it is a God a
 ' Christmas Thing" a way of Life to Love and if you do not have .True Love .then all the Gifts and wealth and Fame and attention and power  in the world will still leave you Poor in spirit and always unhappy ..and needing to hurt and harm others..This Christmas 2014  I wish true Love on everyone and everything..I truly do...because I understand what Love means...
 

Merry Christmas...!.

To The Brave and The Followers of Truth...Three Inspiring Posters from this week...

“The best way to predict the future is to create it.”

~ Peter F. Drucker

“Tell a person they are brave,
and you help them become so.”

~ Thomas Carlyle

“Wisdom, compassion, and courage are the three
universally recognized moral qualities of men.”

~ Confucius

Country Road take me Home to my Homeland and Back....to my Cowboy...

The famous Country singer John Denver who is one of my favorites once sang...

"Country Road Take me home to the Place where I belong..."




 Never before have I felt this truth more intensely than during my very recent trip to India this Autumn after more than 8 years...

From the moment my Cowboy..Brian kissed me Goodbye  and the Air Canada Plane took off from Toronto in late September until I landed in Mumbai in India far far away..almost 24 hours later ( stop over at Zurich)....there was something  so dreamlike and exciting to be going" Home again" that I found myself breaking into tears of joy  at every sight and sound and when someone at Mumbai airport recognized me and came over to say Hi...it was a breakdown moment for me...

For the uninitiated we Bengalis are the most emotional of all Indians and that is why Bengal has produced the most Poets, Singers, Dramatists, Writers, Saints, Sinners ( Bandits) and even one of the Most world renowned Scientists Acharya Jagdish Chander Bose who discovered that Plants, Stones and even metals have emotions was a Bengali..That should explain it all..!!!

So why so long in this day and age.to travel home.? Life in Canada..sometimes keeps us chained for a long long time and then suddenly you realize that the years have passed..and then no matter what you do and how busy you are someone and something is tugging at your heart and calling you from afar..That 'Call from Afar' is the Call of your Mother and your Motherland...and your home..a Home that she and Dad created together with their Love and Sacrifices...

View from my Plane of Zurich below..

I have always been close to my Mother and my Father..though he passed away 24 years ago in November 1990..Coming home to Mother this time was as always very very precious..

She had waited for me for many years and stayed awake all of that night...to open the door in the early hours of 3.13 am in the morning....The next two days between jet lag and catching up I held her close and cried and told her how much I love her..I saw that though her beautiful hair had grown more silver and she a bit more frail..she was still my " Mamma" and I her child..somethings never change and never will...like the Love and Bond between a Mother and her Children..but my Native Land India surely has.changed....After 8 years I almost felt I was in a new land..The day I landed in India and very new and dynamic Prime Minister of India Mr Narendra Modi was in the USA and his historic speech at the Madison square Garden had the nation spell bound.. Everyone seemed to be watching him on TV that night and though I am no fan of Politicians I could feel that this was a man with a difference..a man from the grass roots who understood the pulse of a Nation..a man who could stand up and say." We are a No Longer a Nation of Snake Charmers but a Nation with many gifted and extremely smart people..so wake up to the new reality..

" Indians are educated, hard working and comming your way..!...

The key points he made about India being the Nation with the youngest population on Earth..with 65 % of the population being below 35 years of age..of " Brand India" becoming a reality, rather than just a dream and creating opportunity and development and becoming a regional Superpower to be reckoned with resonated well with all.  

Gateway of Gardens at Home..Pune India

He dared religious Fundamentalists and enemies from across the North Western and Eastern borders of India to mess with India and face the consequences and even the US President looked timid and small as the " New Global leader from India " was ' visibly' born..All this may sound very boastful and the opposite of humility to many..but there are times when a Leader must stand up for his Nation and his people..
PM Modi's High Power meeting with the top ten CEO's of America had India cheering and within hours the word in business circles was out..Non Resident Indians will pump trillions of dollars into the Indian Sub continent to make the vision of a developed India come true under a Leader who means business. War, terrorism, Religious Fundamentalism are not the Goals of most Indians..rather Peace, development , a better life for all and over coming the challenges of the past is what most people seek.
In the I.T ( Information Technology) corridors of Western India where I grew up..Pune, Mumbai..Bangalore..Hyderabad..and beyond the landscape has dramatically changed...The Four-way Highways and huge Office buildings suddenly connect cities and towns and villages within hours No more Bullock carts and Water Buffaloes walking along the roads...Malls and shopping centers dot the cities and small towns and suddenly everyone has buying power. The Diwali festival season blew me away...Never as much as now do Middle Class and Wealthy families have the ability to throw thousands of dollars ( Not rupees) worth..for the Holiday season and the Big Brands are wooing them in a bigger way than they woo Shoppers in North America.
   ..Now everyone in India is suddenly talking..buying and shopping.

.Munni the girl who comes in to cook and clean at my Mother's place..has a new Nokia cell phone and Baru our family House Keeper since 1982 who is more like a brother to us has a Samsung make one. When I left India 14 years ago as a `Hot shot reporter.'there were only Two reporters in the Police Press room who owned cell phones . The devices were huge  with long antennas sticking out and they had to be carried around in special bags.In those days owning a cell phone was a ' Status symbol" No longer so.. 




 There is a New Breed of rich and `happening' Jet Setters from India and they are closer home that you can imagine.. These men and women who 15 + years ago or less worked very hard and sacrificed a lot to graduate from the IITs " Indian Institutes of Technology" that are considered to be some of the highest Schools of Technology in India and also recognized around the world...and from the local Engineering and Technology Schools and Colleges in India where studies and " career" and hard work come first......
They are the new breed of "Jet Setters" such as my Cousin Subhashish gradate from IIT Khadagpur India. He works as a senior executive for an I.T Dutch owned Global company in Pune India that flies him to Kansas in USA, Shangai in China and Tokyo in Japan..three times a month and then back to India... where he gets to spend the rest of his time with his wife and child between jet lag days.He trains American, Chinese and Japanese Engineers on a IT program he created. At home he is the simple, unpretentious, funny Bengali boy we grew up with...frequent world travel and the high life has not changed him at all... 

Durga Puja celebrations on India for Daserah and Diwali.
When the Goddess's visit Earth-..Humankind can...

My own brother Tutu spends two weeks of the month in California the HQ of his company, and then a week at home in India where he overseas the India operations and another with his family in the Middle East....and they are just the tip of the ice berg of regular Jet setters.
In every family I know..boys and girls I grew up with are no longer " Awe struck" or" Impressed" by the N.R.I ( Non Resident Indian ) cousin , friend or Uncle or Aunt visiting home....everyone I knew is a World traveler, Everyone is on the move and getting very wealthy.They are also terribly Jet lagged and in any major International flight headed to Mumbai or Pune or Bangalore..75 % of the passengers are Tired Indian techies just waiting to get back home from their projects in USA and Europe...But as the Prime Minister Modi asked..What about those who did not have an Education in Computer technology..where do they go?
And that is the Breed of Grass root Business men and women I salute and take my Hat off to..The spirit of Entrepreneurship is alive and growing and the New Prime Minister Narendra Modi himself is the best example of this truth. He is proud of his very humble roots as a Tea Stall owner..yet his hard work, Integrity..search for perfection and being a living example of his spiritual beliefs ( he is a great follower of Vivekananda the Monk who spoke of Patriotism, Courage, Action and Faith in one's self and respect for the scriptures of all Faiths..) This `Will Power 'has made him the leader of a Billion people ..from a very humble beginning to the very top...  

Tamarind groves behind our home. in Pune India.

I saw the spirit of entrepreneurship everywhere..Here are some Grass root Business men and women I met..Some are the poorest of the poor..yet  the Salt of the Earth...They have true Grit.. .
I saw that in the 80 year Maushi Bai Flower seller at the Kasbapeth Ganesh temple in Pune..She sells flowers and coconuts to support herself and knows what is the season and reason to raise and lower the price..

80 Year old Maushi bai sells cocunts and flowers

In the The 40 year old Corner Stall owner Bhaura of Rajasthan who operates a tiny Grocers store near the Shanties of Wakedwadi and now is the proud owner of a Sleek General Store, a Snack Bar and a Restaurant that caters to the Employees of the Multi National Companies that have come up in the vicinity of his store.
Bhaura and his family Holiday in Europe and the Far East (Courtesy the  packageTour groups that woo Indians) They.own Prime Real Estate and three cars..they represent the new breed of Grass Root Business people of India..tapping wealth and opportunity when they can. Similarly Mrs Jadhav Bai worked her life as a domestic help..to put her son and daughter into college. her son and daughter now hold good jobs in offices and have set up a ' Cyber Cafe' for her in the ' Hutment coloney' of Wakedewadi in Pune..she is now looked upon with respect and admiration by all the men and women in the area..she earns money in her retirement years and provides a service to many people in the area who cannot afford computers.

Bahura Marwari.the New face of Enterprise India

Mrs Jadhav Bai runs a Cyber Cafe..in Pune









In the Western part of Toronto Canada..Stores are shutting down in Queen Street West..Dundas West..Weston Road and beyond..Malls are dying and business going Bankrupt..In The Western parts of India.every inch of land is Prime real estate and business's pop up by the dozen. recently the British Prime Minister made a statement saying that while recession would soon hit the Western Nations..It was India and China who would be the consistently growing economies of the world. Yet Many people and many parts of India remain poor and under developed and I have heard that the States of West Bengal, Bihar , UP and the Far East have a lot of catching up to do with the rest and the West of India..Corruption , superstitions, inequality between men and women and the classes are evils that may take decades to be eradicated....but the winds of Change are sweeping slowly , but surely across my Motherland...


The Traditional Rangoli design at Sarada Ma Temple in Pune India.

 .. and for me Diwali and Daserah in India is about celebrating the " festival if Lights"..with my own Mother and in My Motherland and I had my Heart fill of this with her ..after a long long time....

Together we revisited the India that I grew up in and the one I truly and deeply Love..
The Mango Groves and Hill Stations of the Western Sahayadri hills...the dusty lanes and Sugar Cane Fields and Guava Groves outside the busy city...and my Mother and I would reminisce about the years of growing up when my Father was there and of how the years have flown and how somethings will always remain the same within..Swami Vivekananda who had traveled the world had once said that the Mothers of India ( In India) were the sweetest because their Love, Self Sacrifice and Motherliness towards all..and their unselfishness and kindness and softness surpassed that of all women in the world..Somethings never change and never will...like the Love and Bond between a Mother and her Child..

Through out my travels I saw the great and noble work that the NGOs Like Ramakrishna Math, Sarada Math and many Individuals were doing in education, Medical aid and social service which was genuine and life changing. These Missions with no `hidden agenda' truly serve the under privileged and it was very inspiring and heartening to see what they do.


Aboriginal children receive free education and meals from the Privately run Ramakrishna Arogya mission in Trimbakeshwar. Nashik.


It was a dream come true again to revisit

.

The India I grew up in...and always loved..the India that has not changed and I hope never will.. The Temples and Ashrams of Sri Ramakrishna and Ma Sarada and the saints of Dehu and Alandi..the hamlets and villages where rivers still flow and birds still sing..
In all our journeys and days together we remembered my Father. My Parents had a wonderful marriage. They were always considered to be the couple who had the deepest Love , respect and happiness as a couple and they were looked up to with great admiration and even a lot of envy because what they had was very deep and prescious. ..and I can say so much for sure..it was True. 
That is why My Mother's greatest wish has been to see me settled and happy with a Man as Noble, Loving and incredible as my Father was and when I met Brian and introduced him to her in 2009 in Canada she was the happiest person. In fact she had said to me " He IS the one who  will hold your hand and walk by your side as your Man till the last breath of your life .

The ancient temple of Trimbakeshwar

In Between our precious time as Mother and daughter together once more.. I would suddenly miss My Brian and Canada and then quickly grab my phone to Call him...
Brian's Pictures dotted my room and our ' Album of Pictures" held a special place on my Mother's reading table ..they reminded me that though I was in a far away dimension of my Homeland and Mother Land..he is a very important part of my Life and always will be ..He is the main reason I belong to Canada....and over the Phone we planned our trip together to India ..an India I am proud off and look forward to showing him soon...
 Absence makes the Heart grow fonder and this has been the first time we have been apart for so may weeks in our 6 years.together... 

This visit has also made me realize how blessed I am to be a true Global Citizen....in Canada the Indian community has kept Indian customs and heritage alive and well...

I see opportunity for all Indo- Canadians to tap into the Wealth of India and Canada with integrity..Indians have buying power and a new brand and Canada too has much to offer..
" Create wealth " said my Father years ago..don't wait for someone to give you opportunities and I strive for that..in fact we can all create jobs and opportunities for others......



The Ramakrishna Mission in Pune India which educates,inspires and provides free medical aid to thousands of people.

Absence makes the Heart grow fonder and this has been the first time we have been apart for so may weeks in our 6 years.together..I miss Brian..I also missed the Vedanta Society of Toronto which I visit often and our Swami Kripamayananda maharaj who has been like a Mother and Father to many of us who have left hearth and home to face our lives here
Canada is still one of the worlds most beautiful places to Live in..with a quality of life that far surpasses any in the world..In India I realized that I could no longer go for a walk...The traffic, the pollution and the gawks..it is not safe for any woman..or any man... ( My cousin Subhashish the Tech wiz kid..tried cycling for exercise one early morning in Pune and almost got hit by a car..the University road which was one of the prettiest and safest has now become a highway..so he stopped). The only way you get your exercise there is by enrolling in an expensive Gym. 
Canadians are also some of the Most Honest and polite people you would meet anywhere and their integrity, hardwork, cleanliness and uprightness are marks of their true character. 
India and Indians have warmth, freindliness, generosity..contentment and making everyone feel at home..Balu the fruit seller from our area who knew me as a child cried when he saw me after 8 Diwalis and sent his assitant to walk me home saying 
" Dont ever get lost again..you are our sister.."  

Balu the Fruit seller with a Golden Heart
What wisdom can you find that is greater than kindness..?

It did not matter to him that I had travelled over half the Earth alone..That is the warmth and the love of the East.."..No one is left alone to Live or Die un cared for..in any Train or bus ride..there will be a hundred people ready to smile at you and befreind you..though foreigners should watch out for some dangers....yet on the whole you will face talkative, freindly, outgoing and well meaning people , some of the poorest of the poor open their homes and invite strangers to dinner..that is the Heart and Soul of India that you will never see anywhere especially in the West... In the West when I travel on the subway and see the coldness and silence with which people watch each other..I miss the warmth and unpretentiousness of the East..in the big cities of Toronto, New York etc..anyone who smiles and talks too much to strangers is probably looked on as an `escapee' from the nearest " Looney Bin"..in India there is a warmth in the air and in the hearts of the simplest of people..who have almost no possession but their ' Golden Hearts'..to call their own.. 
 Finally the time had come to leave home..I cried like a child..I howled when I had to leave my Mother..she gently stroked my head and said.." Every girl leaves home to be with her husband...you have Brian..now you and he must come together often and every year to meet and be with me..this land is his and yours..this home and country is always your own..remember the words of the Vedas..Vasudhaiva Kutumbakam..the World is One Family..".I am always your Mother and no one and nothing will ever come between that Love...( in life we have all met depraved people who may try to sow seeds of venom between parents and their children small or big..it is faith in God and our integrity which helps us recognize that people who do that are your worst enemies).I weep all the way on the flight to Canada..until I land in Toronto on Halloween day and Brian is waiting for me...We hug each other and cry and smile..he understands my pain and tears....He has cleaned and renovated our home to make it more beautiful and welcoming

than before... For days and days I am homesick for my Mother..but he shares with and dilutes that pain with his love..
I realize too that visiting home is symbolic of our spiritual journey and one day going back to our " Real Home"..I remember a Nun at my boarding school long ago once saying that we feel so happy to be " Going home" because it represents our Soul's journey to God.
Traveling across continents also makes us realize that we are not slaves to any land or any Society..Canada is a great land...however it does not recognize the qualifications and skills of many highly qualified immigrants from other lands..This is both the loss of Canada and a loss for the  skilled educated immigrants who come here bringing their wealth and assets .Many immigrants with University Degrees and  High In demand skills are pushed into jobs that do not match their education. This is  a huge Human Resource failure for Canada and that is why The American Dream and the Canadian Dream are not the `same reality'..But things are changing now..and we as skilled immigrants can make that happen.. We perhaps left our Home lands because we wanted a better way of life or there was something we could not attain there..but that does not mean we are slaves to the land or life we choose..The world is shrinking...it is truly a Global Village..with hard work. wisdom and Intelligence...we can create enough wealth to travel between nations and Continents at will and bless others by giving them the same opportunities which we received...
I am humbled to ralise how " free and how Blessed we really are" if we think over it..Most people who travel frequently and are not afraid to see and experience the new are open minded, positive and young in Body, Mind and spirit.. they embody the Spirit of the Eagles..Fly Far and Fly high and keep your eyes on the Goal above and not below.. They are not " Frogs in the Well" who cannot see beyond the boundaries of their own cities and communities .

Inside a shrine in India

 

Back to Canada and Brian..I remember telling my friends and cousins in India that I felt very very Lucky that I had a Love and Life partner like him.In my life and that is what I had been seeking...I had waited for the right man and not the `first man' who came along..I have never believed in a marriage of convenience and hypocrisy which many in India are based on. ..I was never wealth or Money driven..My own Father was a self made man who created wealth and jobs for hundreds of people.. yet he was a simple and unpretentous man..I have often enjoyed playing the role of "unknown alien " because deep in my heart I know I am the daughter of a Man who was as Noble and great as a King in his heart and in his spirit.. Seeing the pampering and " Sultan Like" airs of many Indian men in India and in Indian families out of India today who expect to be served and pampered by Servants, wives, sisters and Mothers after their business trips..it was refreshing to be with "True He Man" Canadian Cowboy....who takes care of his partner and not the other way around..Canadian men treat not just their marriage partners and family with deep respect...but extend that to all...when I was away...between his long hours of work Brian would spend every weekend in cleaning and sprucing up our place for my return..He never went Bar Hopping, clubbing or 'partying' but redecorated our home.....Now if that is not a Gift of Love and dedication..please tell me what is..!
Many people in India and of Indian origin in Canada have stereo type negative images of N American men.and women because that is what they would like to believe...but unless you have loved and been with one as Noble and beautiful as Mine..you will never know the real truth. My parents lived in Canada and loved the people of this land and my Mother blessed me very deeply for a Life of Everlasting Love with my Brian....I believe in counting every blessing we have in life and I count the Love of my Mother and Brian and the  Spiritual Blessings of the Great ones we meet in life such as our Grand Parents and Spiritual teachers  as some of my greatest blessings...I Love you Mamma. and.I Love you Brian.and I Thank God for this wonderful Life.!!!

Welcome Back to Canada !     

                                                                                          Welcome Back to Canada !





A Halloween Pumpkin at Souraren Park Toronto!
Pic taken by Lipi





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